When is my time to go?

Emo kid.. That's what I’ve been called since.. a very long time ago? Maybe I am being emotional.. Maybe I’m just too sensitive.. to the extend where I feel.. out of place.. out of this world.. Stranger in the world? Ya.. Same thing applies to the church. Man.. Even reading whatever I just typed makes me feel that I’m being emo too.. Sighs..

Whatever happened to building people up? Maybe its cause I’ve been the laughingstock all my life, so much so that the people around hardly even take to heart that I’ve got feelings too? The feeling of trying too hard to fit in came back again.. Time and time again I’ll remind myself that they did not mean harm, and I’ll continue living this miserable and forlorn life of mine as though nothing happened, as though it was just a passing phase of my life..

I guess I’m being emo again.. I've concluded that it’s just me. Always took things too seriously.. when others claim that they were joking only. Life sucks.. I have serious issues with everyone. Maybe I’m meant to be a loner.. born freak.. a weirdo who laughs like an idiot.. Come to think of it.. I really need to retreat.. Somewhere far away.. You know.. Leave this place.. Escapism.. Than to remain here where your ego gets crushed.. No pride.. Never given credit in anything you do.. Get yelled at when things don’t go their way.. Go through loads of shit just to get something done.. Maybe I need to get a life.. How ironic..

No friends, being laughed at, pushed around, having to do shit, insulted and ridiculed by people, being the butt of the joke.. Sick and tired of this world.. Sick of living..