Ello.. Blogging after a long long time again. Before i start, i just wanna say that this entry is gonna be emo.. So if u cant tahan me being emo, just.. go visit another web page or something.
Anyway, i realised this is the only avenue i have to rant on and on without ppl getting irritated with me at the end of it. Well, at least i dont think so. Just came back from "Philos" band prac at Bethany Presby. Am their vocalist for a few songs. And i came to a realisation that i sound horrible. Come to think of it. I never did sound nice. Vocally that is. I always thought that i sing ok. But the more i start listening to myself, the more i realise that i dont sound nice at all. It's damn sad. Then i start to wonder. And i came to a conclusion that i suck at every other thing u can think of. Here's a list of things i will never match up to any of my other peers.
Vocals
Studies
Spiritually
Musically
Speech
Fashion
Keeping secrets
Being there for a friend
These are but what i can think of off hand. I've really started to wonder what in the world am i good at. And whenever i "think" i am good at something, i am also reminded of someone who can do that thing better than me. Depressing eh? Haiz.. Maybe i suck. What is my gift? I cant minister to others like how my peers can, and worst of all, i dont even think i am a reliable friend. I've recently let slip a secret which i kinda promised i would never tell anyone. And now that friend came to know of it. And i cant help but feel really bad about it. Even till today. I dont dare face that friend..
I guess it all boils down to me sucking in everything. Lance, you just suck. U are horrible in everything. I feel damn loser. Seriously..
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